At Least They Have Good Beer

That's true... they do always seem to have ammo.

I may have mentioned it before, but I am fan of the AMC television program “The Walking Dead.” A huge fan. I’m not entirely sure what about flesh-eating zombies and post-apocalyptic survival appeals to my senses, but for whatever reason, that show never ceases to entertain me.

The reason I mention it today is because last fall, during the fifth episode of season three, craft beer made a cameo. Ordinarily, I cannot abide product placement, but when that product is craft beer, it’s a breath of fresh air since smaller companies (and good beer) usually don’t get the air time.

In the episode, the town of Woodbury is holding a celebration, and the beer they are drinking is SweetWater Brewing Company’s Georgia Brown and Red Brick Brewing Company’s Hoplanta IPA. It should be pointed out that the show is set in Georgia, and those are both Atlanta-based breweries, but still, that’s pretty awesome if you ask me. The network and producers could have had the characters drinking some corn/rice-based, yellow, fizzy, industrial, swill beer, but instead, they opted to have their characters drink good beer. Way to go AMC. Say “no” to big beer!

This of course got me thinking, would living through a zombie apocalypse be so bad if they had good beer to drink? It certainly would be a welcome creature comfort, serving to both distract us from reality and take the edge off. Obviously, we would have to enjoy our craft beer responsibly, due to limited supplies and the need to not be totally wasted when a zombie tried to bite us.

I know you’re probably thinking that eventually, the beer would run out. In reality, because of people like me, that would NOT be a problem. Beer has been made by humans since humans settled down in one place and started farming. Some historians and archaeologists even believe that beer was the reason humans stopped wandering and settled in one place. The beauty of brewing beer is, if you can make a fire, you can brew beer. No electricity is required. And since some of us have bothered to learn how to make the stuff instead of just drinking it, we will be able to continue to provide that service until the day the zombies finally bite us.

The Governor keeps the crappy macro beer out of Woodbury

And it’s not just brewing – we will need farmers to cultivate the barley, wheat, rye, and of course, the hops! We’ll also need a miller to mill the grain and a malt house to malt the milled the grain. Someone will also need to grow and maintain orchards and fruit tree groves so that there will be wild yeast in the air to take care of the fermenting.

Not only would beer still be available in a post-apocalyptic world, it would also have to be crafty, whether the beer plebes liked it or not. There probably wouldn't be electricity, which means the major factory-style breweries would go away, or at least have to be steam-powered. Either way, there would be less of that going on. Not to mention that without oil refineries, there is no gasoline, which means no cars (though they do drive cars on “The Walking Dead”), which means smaller, more tribal-like societies, which means a smaller, artisanal, cottage-industry-type of business model with little to no distribution beyond the local settlement… the point is, any beer that is “made” (as opposed to left over from before), will be made by hand, in small batches, with attention to detail and love of brewing guiding the brewer’s hands. Honestly, it seems as though the beer would be better following a cataclysmic event of some kind.

Michonne will make sure the beer stays crafty.

But all hypothetical, post-apocalyptic theories about beer and society aside, it is good to see the craft beer community getting some love from a very popular show. I’m not sure if big beer was too short-sighted to see the opportunity for product placement, or if the creators of the show are beer nerds who know better, but for whatever reason, SweetWater and Red Brick were chosen. It should be pointed out that it is not just isolated to one episode – there have been other incidents of craft beer product placement in the show in other episodes as well. Usually, it’s a SweetWater beer sign in an abandoned bar, or something else that is only in the background. But in the fifth episode of season three, craft beer was in the spotlight, alongside the Governor and Michonne. Maybe surviving after most of our fellow humans are gone won’t be so bad after all.

Note – No, I am not rooting for the apocalypse to happen. I’m just trying to look on the bright side of things.

Here’s to craft-brewed happiness… Cheers!

Poppa's Got a Brand New Brew

T-Shirts are always so true!

My parents used to tell me that “everyday was kids’ day.” I never really grasped what they meant by that until I had kids of my own. Now I get it.

Fortunately, society has deigned to give the hard working patriarchs of the familial unit one day a year that still belongs to them. One day to celebrate the fact that Dad gives up the other 364 calendar days to the whims of the kids. This Sunday, in case you forgot, happens to be that day.

SPOILER ALERT – It’s Father’s Day.

So being that most dads like beer, and this is a holiday designed to let dad relax a little bit and perhaps even get what he wants for a change, the logical conclusion is that we should buy dad a beer (or two, or a sixer, or a suit case, or a keg…).  How does one do this you ask? Do I really need to go over this?

Step 1 – Figure out if Dad does in fact like beer. If the answer is yes, proceed to step 2. If no, we have a bigger problem on our hands.

Step 2 – Figure out what kind of beer he likes. If the answer is a proper craft brewed style of beer, proceed to step 3. If the answer is some industrial, corn/rice-based, yellow, fizzy swill beer, we have a bigger problem on our hands.

Step 3 – Proceed to your local craft beer selling retail place and buy dad his preferred beer. I recommend a six-pack of onesies (the build-a-rack of singles that most beer stores and grocery stores have these days) as it allows for a greater selection and an overall greater experience in my humble opinion. Of course, if dad has a preferred make and model of craft beer, he will certainly be pleased by you giving him a (insert quantity here) of his favorite brew. If you’re not sure, and you want some suggestions, here is a Father’s Day inspired list of craft beer, courtesy of the lads over at CraftBeer.com:

Big Black VooDoo Daddy | VooDoo Brewing Co. | Meadville, PA - A big, viscous Russian imperial stout rich in notes of chocolate, vanilla, roasted coffee and dark fruits. BBVD is hopped with Chinook, Northern Brewer and Cascade to add a subtle bitterness to this robust ale.

Big Daddy IPA | Speakeasy Ales & Lagers | San Francisco, CA - Big Daddy IPA is a generously dry-hopped yet surprisingly drinkable American-style India pale ale. Poured into a standard American pint glass, the beer is a golden straw color, with tight carbonation and a slightly off-white head that leaves a lovely lacing. The aroma is floral, fresh grass, pine needles, grapefruit and subtle notes of fresh bread. Also available: Double Daddy.

Dad’s Little Helper | Rogue Ales | Newport, OR - Dad’s Little Helper Black IPA is deep mahogany in color with roasted malt and hop aromas and a dense creamy head. It enters the palate with intense hop flavor and coats the tongue with a rich maltiness.

Dad’s Oatmeal Stout | Geaghan Brothers Brewing | Bangor, ME - This oatmeal stout is full bodied and silky smooth with coffee-like aromas.  Additions of Chinook and U.S. Goldings hops give balance and moderate bitterness to this rich, dark beer.

Hoosier Daddy | New Albanian Brewing Co. | New Albany, IN - Dubbed a “crimson & cream ale,” this seasonal is medium-bodied, with overall balance favoring malt, and a slightly sweet edge.

Hop Daddy IPA | Main Street Brewery | Corona, CA - This IPA was the winner of a bronze and silver medal in 2008 and 2000, respectively, at the Great American Beer Festival in the English-Style India Pale Ale category.

Blasted reality. Always ruining fantasy.

Step 4 – Now that you’ve purchased dad’s beer, give it to him on Sunday and say “Happy Father’s Day dad! Thanks for putting up with all of my crap all these years!” Pretty simple.

Okay, so now let’s discuss bigger and more epic applications of the “give dad beer on Father’s Day” theory, because let’s face it – if you’re going to be a bear, be a grizzly bear.

Since the name of the game on Father’s Day is to give dad what he wants, and since in this particular vignette he wants beer, why not take him to a place where he can have his beer and drink it too? Take him to a brewery, where he can hang out with fellow beer fans, see how it’s made, drink it straight off the line and even walk out with some cool merch and a story to tell. Chances are there’s one in your neck of the woods. If you can’t take him there to celebrate, go there yourself and buy dad a growler of something he’ll like. Support your local brewers.

I think a better question is "why NOT take dad to a brewery on Father's Day?"

Another thing that qualifies as something dads want on Father’s Day is good food, and it just so happens that craft beer and good food go together like craft beer and good food. You thought I was going to say peas and carrots didn’t you? Seriously, find a local restaurant that has a good craft beer selection and have your Father’s Day dinner there. The ideal spot is a brewpub or alehouse if you have that sort of thing near you. Dad will dig it the most. Plus, since most restaurants offer deals, discounts, promotions, etc on Father’s day, you can save a little money while you’re at it. Everybody wins.

Now THAT's a Father's Day gift!

There are also beer related gifts you can get for dad, such as glassware, beer shirts or hats, flip-flops with church keys in the sole (awesomeness), a kegerator (epic awesomeness), a beer-related tie, a book about beer, etc. The possibilities are endless.

So this Father’s Day, don’t be that kid that just gives dad a card – give him what he really wants for Father’s Day, which I think we all can agree is beer. Lots of beer. And a steak.

Here’s to craft-brewed happiness… Cheers!

June 1st, 2013 - A Beer Odyssey

Great tune.

Or perhaps it’s an oddity – This is Major Tom to Ground Control… I’m stepping through the door…

June 1st is not particularly special in and of itself, unless your birthday is today, in which case, Happy Birthday!!! But other than birthdays, it’s just another summer day. Of course, it happens to fall on a Saturday this year, which qualifies it for…

… RANDOM SUMMER BEER SATURDAY QUEST status. And, no, I didn't just make that up. Okay, maybe I did.

What am I blathering about? I’ll tell you what I’m blathering about. It’s summer, it’s nice outside, you don’t have to work today, so let’s go beer questing. Plain and simple. The quest can be as easy or elaborate as you wish to make it. It can take place at a single destination, multiple destinations, or maybe even from the comfort of your own home. It is quite literally whatever you want to do with this opportunity.

So as a way to inspire you, I’ll reveal what I've got up my sleeve for today’s beer odyssey. WARNING: The following descriptions and accounts contains SPOILERS, for those of you who are joining me on today’s adventure and want to remain surprised.

Be careful with this one.

A few days ago, I received a message from Brixx Woodfired Pizza in Woodbridge, VA, alerting me to the fact that they have acquired a cask of Lake Erie Monster Double IPA, courtesy of the Great Lakes Brewing Company out of Cleveland, OH. It would be tapped at 1:00pm sharp on Saturday, June 1st and be available until floated.

What’s the big deal? Well, as you all know by now, I am an admitted hop head. I would be willing (if it weren't for pressing obligations in my real life) to scour the earth looking for IPAs, Double IPAs, Imperial IPAs, etc, just to sit back and enjoy them. Not to mention that Lake Erie Monster is a seasonal rarity release and is not always available. Additionally, beers out of a cask are ALWAYS delicious and cause to literally drop everything you are doing and partake. This particular Double IPA is hopped with Simcoe and Willamette hops from the Pacific Northwest and weighs in at 9.1% ABV, 80 IBU, and has a final gravity of 22 degrees plato. Everything you want; nothing you don’t.

Clearly, this is a prime place to begin my sortie into deliciousness. Once I have had my share of the the Monster, it will be time for round two, which is…

…pre-gaming for round three. Okay, I know what you’re thinking. Why not just label this part a transition and make round three round two? Because it’s my beer odyssey… not yours. Besides, a pre-game should never be treated as an afterthought. It is just as important as the events that precede it and those that follow it. An entire evening can be made or broken with the pre-game.

Once the prescribed amount of time has elapsed, the pre-game will end and we’ll be on to round three. A few times a year, I contribute my time and effort to serving beer to the thirsty masses… in person. This is one of those times. I will be serving beer in a beer tent on a beach to those who crave malted-barley-based refreshment (and have enough tickets to trade me for the beer). I’m not going to sit here and tell you that I won’t be having a few myself while I hand them out, because that would be a lie.

$7.75 for horse urine in a bottle? That's highway robbery!

Once the beer serving is done, I will then fade into the throngs of thirsty beer patrons at the event and continue drinking until I determine that enough is enough. Should be a pretty nice little Saturday, maybe Home Depot or Bed, Bath, and Beyond… not sure if we’ll have enough time.

… for here am I sitting in my tin can…

Here’s to craft-brewed happiness… Cheers!

Has Anyone Seen My Missing Rhinoceros?

I know what you’re thinking… “How do you lose a rhinoceros?” I mean, they’re not exactly inconspicuous, and it’s not as though they’re a set of car keys. Truer statements were never made about rhinos, but in this instance, I am of course referring to the little brewery that is tucked away in the rolling hills of Northern Virginia… called Lost Rhino Brewing Company.

I had the pleasure of visiting this brewery this past week as part of my American Craft Beer Week festivities, and I was impressed. Not because of the sheer grandeur of the place, but rather by how a brewery so simple and off the grid could literally knock my socks off with their beer quality, pleasant atmosphere, and overall enjoyable operation. I’m still trying to find my socks.

The brewery is one of the very new craft breweries in the DC/Maryland/Northern Virginia region, having only opened their doors in May of 2011. The owners and head brewers were both former employees of Old Dominion Brewing Company in Ashburn, VA, until Dominion moved their operation out to Delaware as part of an Anheuser Busch power and money grab in 2008. In fact, the owners purchased their equipment from Dominion when they closed down the Ashburn brewery.

The facade... looks more like a dentist's office.

Lost Rhino is located in a commercial/business/industrial park-style building in Ashburn, just north of Dulles International Airport. If you didn't know it was there, you would never find it, as there are no signs visible from any nearby roads. The only indicator that I was even in the right place was when I spotted their grain silo on the back of the building. Very low key and off the grid.

Upon entering their brewery (and finding myself in their brewpub/tasting room), the first thing I noticed were picnic tables lined up in front of what appeared to be a kitchen. It reminded me of an ice-cream stand more than a restaurant or in this case, tasting room. Right next to the kitchen was an over-sized bar where people were gathering around and placing drink orders, and a set of large community tables right next to that. A lady then approached me and told me that we were to sit wherever we wanted, and that all food and drink orders were to be placed at the bar. Very laid back.

Inside the tasting room.

The menu was also very minimal, fitting the theme of this establishment almost perfectly. There were only six appetizers, four entree options, three kids items, two non-beer drink options, and two desert options. That was it. To be fair, the food I ended up ordering (jerk chicken wrap with chips) was excellent, but the minimalist menu was a touch surprising.

The beer, on the other hand, was the exact opposite of minimalist, almost as if to say “We’re a brewery! You come here for the beer.” They had their three staples of course (New River Pale Ale, Face Plant IPA, and Rhino Chasers Pacific Pils) along with roughly 15 or so rarities and seasonals… quite a lot to choose from. They also served the beer in the correct glassware, something that still to this day is not always the case. The Vienna lager was served in a dimple glass, the Belgian tripel in a tulip glass, and so on. Also available, if you’re like me and want to try them all (and still be able to drive home afterwards) are 4oz taster glasses (the flight minimum is six). You can also order their beer in pint or half-pint quantities.

Inside the brewery, with co-owners and brewers Matt Haggerman and Favio Garcia.

In addition to food and beer, the bar also serves as the point of sale for merch. Lost Rhino offers several different options for t-shirts, stickers, glassware, growler fills, purchased beer, hats, etc. Obviously, you can’t drink the purchased beer or growler beer on site, but it’s a great way to take the beer home with you.

The atmosphere in the brewery is extremely family friendly, so much so that they have bins full of toys tucked under the stage (where the bands play at night) for the kids to play with. The staff is very friendly, and at least during the day, the patrons are all pretty well behaved. There are also tours available (for kids too) during the day so you can get a closer behind-the-scenes look at their operation.

Now on to the brews.

Delicious double IPA

I started out with an Ice Breaker Imperial/Double IPA. This was really impressive – intensely balanced malts to forceful hop backbone. Definitely would drink again – recommend to all.

The next brew was an American Barleywine called 2200 lbs. of Sin. This one was a monster, very dark and very sweet, as a barleywine should be. The sheer weight and maltiness of this beer should not be taken lightly and are not for the faint of heart.

Next was a Belgian Brown Ale called Holy Brew Brown. Delightful and refreshing. Darker and more robust than a typical Belgian, but with all of the crispness and tart yeast notes that you would expect. Recommend to all.

That was followed by a Saison called Pretty In Pink: Awareness Ferments Hope. This was a breast cancer awareness inspired collaboration project between Lost Rhino, Vintage 50 (Leesburg, VA), Hardywood Park (Richmond, VA), and Bluejacket (Washington, DC). The beer was brewed over hibiscus and pomegranates, which imparted a pinkish hue and a sweeter flavor profile than a typical saison. Very refreshing, and a treat for all Belgian beer lovers.

Next on my trip around the Lost Rhino galaxy was their Stout, aptly called Woody Stout. Let me just quote the Rhino gang on this one: “Roasted malts and herbal hops provide an aroma of coffee and spicy chocolate that blends with caramel, and vanilla notes that are products of the aging in the Bourbon soaked oak barrels.” Everything you want; nothing you don’t. I don’t have to tell you that I was fan. This beer also comes with an interesting aside –

Great beer.

So there I was, standing before the bar at the Lost Rhino brewery, rattling off the list of beers I wanted, when I was told that they had just floated the last of the Woody Stout, and I would not be able to have any today. I was bummed, but as there were so many other wonderful beers to try, I quickly got over it. Twenty minutes later, as I was enjoying the rest of my beers, the lady from the bar came over to me with a glass of Woody Stout, and told me that they just found some in the back, and that I was going to get to have some after all… no charge. The day (and the beer) was mine, and Lost Rhino gets further kudos for their efforts. Taking care of customers folks.

After that, I began to examine my next brew – a Sour IPA called Birth of Ace. This beer is an American-style IPA that is fermented with brettanomyces bruxellenis, to give it a sour complexion. Balanced sour and hoppy bitter notes create a very palatable refreshing beer drinking experience. Delicious.

Okay, okay… I’ll tell you. Brettanomyces bruxellensis is a yeast native to the Senne valley near Brussels, Belgium. It plays a key role in the spontaneous fermentation of typical Belgian beer styles such as Lambic, Flanders red ales, Gueuze, and Kriek. It competes with brewer's yeast, as well as other microorganisms, in fermenting the wort, and gives the beer a distinctive and slightly sour, earthy character. In fact, if you've ever had a beer that was sour, chances are it was fermented with Brett.

The final beer in my Lost Rhino safari was their Vienna Lager, called Mudhound. It was a perfect Vienna lager, the kind that makes you sit back and say, “Wow! This is what a lager is supposed to taste like.” (he said while starring at a Budweiser sign)

Very nice.

My overall opinion of Lost Rhino is a good one, and I highly recommend that you take a trip out to Loudoun County, Virginia to give these guys your business. I do so without any bias or compensation from the brewers themselves (though I am certainly willing to listen if anyone from Lost Rhino is reading this and wants to talk). Visit their website for more information.

Here’s to craft-brewed happiness… Cheers! #ACBW

American Craft Beer Week 2013 #ACBW

It’s the moment we've all been waiting for! It’s time for American Craft Beer Week!

From Monday, May 13th through Sunday, May 19th, as in next week, the country will be celebrating American Craft Beer Week (ACBW). This is the eighth consecutive year for the national observation, and third in a row in which there will be events hosted in all 50 states. American Craft Beer Week, which is organized by the Brewers Association, is a celebration of U.S. craft brewers across the country. Last year, ACBW was celebrated by breweries, brewpubs and retailers in all 50 states with over 1,300 official events. More than 35,000 beer lovers were part of the Facebook community alone, undoubtedly making 2012 the largest celebration of ACBW yet.

The tradition continues this year as ACBW will provide an opportunity for small and independent brewers, craft beer enthusiasts and the community of better beer retailers to celebrate the ever advancing beer culture here in the U.S. Events will include exclusive brewery tours, special beer releases, multi-course food and pairing dinners, collaboration beers, retail promotions and much more.

The United States of Craft Brewers.

Why do we celebrate?

Because beer doesn't have to be yellow, corn/rice based, mass-produced swill... that's why!

Don't mess with your uncle.

There are roughly 50 official state and regional beer weeks throughout the year, but this one is the mother of them all. Beer weeks celebrate the culture of craft beer, and give breweries and beer businesses the opportunity to connect with their fans. ACBW celebrates the unification of these regional events, offering craft beer fans everywhere options to learn about, enjoy and share beer with each other on a national level. As we all know, America’s craft beer industry is thriving, with over 2,300 small and independent breweries responsible for not only advancing the food arts world, but pouring money into the economy via tourism and jobs while creating an overall vibrant craft beer scene nationwide. America’s craft brewers are certainly something to celebrate. If you’re still not convinced, read the official ACBW Manifesto, written by small and independent craft brewers.

How can you celebrate ACBW?

In my opinion, the best and easiest way to support this phenomenon is to visit your favorite local brewery, restaurant or tap room and enjoy your local craft beers. As you may have gathered, this national beer week is a pretty big deal, and all of your local brewers and craft beer providers will be celebrating. They will be hosting events at their places of business, but even beyond that, there will be a sense of community and camaraderie in the air that seems amplified compared to the usual inclusionary spirit. Go to their websites for lists of events, but just popping in and wishing everyone a happy American Craft Beer Week works just as well.

The gang at Elysian Brewing Company in Seattle, WA, raising some pints.

For those of you who are a bit more ambitious, you can host your own event. Gather-up a varied assortment of craft beers made by small, independent brewers and host a tasting, food pairing, or maybe just a beer drinking party. Rent out a hall and invite the whole town, or have it in your driveway next to a fire pit and invite the neighbors. As formal or informal as you like - endless possibilities.

Social drinking is the best kind.

On a similar vein, Thursday, May 16 at 8:00pm Eastern Time is the first ever national ACBW toast. Clearly, this occasion calls for you to invite your friends and family over to collectively toast to craft beer, knowing that the entire country is toasting with you at the exact same time! Take to the social media world and post on Facebook or tweet your toast, or check it into Untappd.

Speaking of social media, the official hashtag for American Craft Beer Week is #ACBW… use it on all of your social drinking escapades during the week. You can also show support of ACBW by joining the more than 50,000 beautiful craft beer lovers on the ACBW Facebook page and updating your social media accounts with these cover photos and  profile pictures.

More links:

For a complete official list of events near you, visit the official American Craft Beer Week events calendar, hosted by CraftBeer.com. Remember though… these are just the official ones. For the unofficial events, plug-in to a craft beer enthusiast near you… they always know what’s what.

Download the 2013 American Craft Beer Week Poster… because it’s cool.

Check out the CraftBeer.com official website for American Craft Beer Week!

Here's to you, craft beer drinkers!

Enjoy your week, craft beer lovers! It’s about those that make, it’s about those that enjoy, and most of all, it’s about the beer! Happy American Craft Beer Week!!! #ACBW

Here’s to craft-brewed happiness… Cheers!

Draught Day

The commish

With the first overall pick in the 2013 craft beer draft, the Sous Brewer selects…

Okay, so all bad puns that may or may not exist within the title of this post aside (perhaps it’s a palindrome); the NFL draft is currently underway up in New York. It got me thinking, what if there was a craft beer draft? What if you had the number one overall pick?

It’s basically a question of “what is your favorite craft beer?” This of course is a nearly impossible question to answer, as there are so many wonderful craft beers out there to choose from. Even if you have a favorite style, which might help to limit the field somewhat, you’re still faced with the daunting task of selecting one out of a cast of thousands; a brew that you can build your evening around. Perhaps you select based on best available, or perhaps you select based on biggest need.

Then again, perhaps there is no wrong answer and this is all much ado about nothing.

So how do people decide? What are the factors that we use, whether they are conscious or subconscious, to choose between all of these delicious options we have before us?

Yeah, that's right, whatever beer I want, whenever I want

The first thing that comes to mind is availability, which technically is a limitation that is imposed on us beyond our control and not a determining factor that we use to help us choose. You could levy some degree of control over availability by only dining in restaurants with expansive beer menus, or choosing to shop at a specialty beer store over a grocery store, but even then, you’re still at the mercy of someone else’s understanding of what people like. In a perfect world, we could all have access to whatever beer we want at any given time because we would have the computer that Jean Luc Picard has in his stateroom that makes whatever food or drink you say into it. In a perfect world, I would be paid $100 per word for these ridiculous blog posts of mine.

An example of a distinguishing factor that we have a lot more control over is the “support your local brewer” mentality. If offering patronage to your native economy is something that gives you a sense of civic pride, this is a great way to select one beer over another. The locals are becoming more prevalent in most markets, but are often times smaller and more artisinal. For this reason, they crave your business, and by selecting them, you keep your money in the local economy. Everybody wins!

Brand loyalty from southeastern Pennsylvania

Somewhat related to the “local” motivator is the “brand loyalty” objective. Many people grew up on a particular brand of beer, or have a loved one who works for a specific company. Perhaps you prefer breweries from the city you were born in (which is kind of like extended-local brewer support). Whatever the reason for your loyalty, assuming your preferred brewery is available (there’s that pesky availability thing again), it can certainly help you whittle down the options.

You could also pick based on a brewery’s, or even on a beer’s, reputation. It’s very common for people to see a beer that they’re not sure about, but since it’s made by a brewery that they know makes great beer, they go for it, based on the reputation of the brewers. Similarly, perhaps they read beer blogs and other brewing publications, and notice that everyone is raving about a particular brew. Reputation is great way to separate the throngs of available options on the beer shelf.

Speaking of people raving about beer, another determining factor could be a recommendation. If you have friends like me in your life, you've probably got a list a mile long of “beers you have to try.” We beer people love to share our experiences (obviously), so if you’re looking for someone to make the choice for you, all you have to do is ask.

Most people will never see this
Untappd badge, awarded for drinking
2,500 unique beers

The final motivator that I will mention here is probably my favorite… the “ I've never had this beer before” consideration. This one speaks to the inner-adventurer in all of us. This is a style of beer selection that has been propped-up by the Untappd app on our smart phones and hand-held devices, which has created a legion of beer drinkers who are always on the lookout for the ever-elusive unique check-in. When you are trolling the aisles at the beer store looking specifically for beers you've never had before, particularly if you’re checking your Untappd account to make sure, you know you've become what I affectionately call a beer nerd. It’s okay to admit it.

There are, of course, many other motivating factors at play that lead a person to select one brew over another (IE: label art, mood, cleverness of the name, etc.). Whichever method you are using, as long as it helps you narrow down the potential beers, it works. As long as you don’t wind up in the hypothetical situation of having to select the first overall pick in a craft beer draft of sorts, in which case I don’t know what to tell you. Trade down?

Here’s to craft-brewed happiness… Cheers!

Someone Put Fruit in My Beer!!!

Fruit in beer you say? Bad form Mr. Smee!

Blogger’s Note: I know it’s bad form to begin a blog post with administrivia, but we need to take a brief timeout before we even get started for this important announcement: Today marks the glorious and magnanimous return of the slowest growing blog sensation on these interwebs. After making you writhe in insecurity and misery for the past two weeks, I am back from my hiatus, full of energy, piss, and vinegar (full of something), and ready to bring craft-brewed enlightenment to your curious and thirsty souls. You don’t have to thank me. It’s the least I can do. Now, let’s get to it.

One of the most common complaints that I hear when enjoying craft beer with others is about fruit beers. For many people, the sweet and/or tart flavor profiles achieved through brewing with fruit are too much, and offensive. While I will admit that I have encountered fruit beers that were over the top and not as enjoyable as I would like, it is an absolute fallacy to say that all fruit beers are bad. You’ll find that like everything else in brewing, there are multitudes of factors that determine the end result, and by extension, whether said result is enjoyable or not.

Historically, brewing with fruit goes all the way back to the beginning. Brewers have always looked for ways to impart unique and enjoyable flavors into their beer, mainly because fermented malted barley by itself tastes incomplete. This is one of the reasons we use hops in beer today (not the only reason), as the bittering qualities of the hop flower add flavors that balance and pair well with the sweet malted barley. In the days before hops, brewers used a substance called gruit to flavor the beer. Gruit was quite literally whatever a brewer could find lying around that could be used to flavor beer, which often included fruit. In spite of what the Reinheitsgebot purists of Germany would profess, the reality is that fruit has been part of beer brewing since beer brewing became a thing.

You were so preoccupied with whether you could put fruit in
beer, you didn't stop to ask if you should.

Spin it forward to today and we find many different “fruit beers” available at your local craft beer retail establishment. Those who follow this blog know that I am meticulous about categorizing things, and spoiler alert – it’s about to happen again. Where is Ian Malcolm?

The first type of fruit beer that I am going to mention briefly and then dismiss completely is what I call “Commercial Fermented Fruit Brews” or CFFBs. CFFBs are your hard ciders and malted fruit juice drinks like Smirnoff Ice, Mike’s Hard Lemonade, Bacardi Whatever, etc. I have no time for these, even if they are properly made and independently owned, which would qualify them for craft status. Some people like them; I do not. If you must drink them, I recommend drinking the Angry Orchard series as I know for a fact it is privately owned and properly operated. Check the label when you drink these as they are often made by Budweiser, Miller, Coors, or one of the other miscreants out there.

The second category of fruit beers are those that live on the opposite side of the spectrum from CFFBs, in which the brewer is using fruit as a balancing equal part of a larger equation. We’ll call these “Fruit as a Balancing Adjunct Brew” or FBABs. A good example of this is a properly made Belgian witbier, in which the brewer adds citrus zest to the boil in order to impart a slight citrus note into the finished product. The fruit flavor will not be dominant in the end, and it isn't meant to be. It will simply be part of the whole flavor profile that the finished product has. Most Christmas Ales will fit this category too as they are usually brewed with fruit, but that fruit is only part of the greater compliment of flavors like cinnamon, ginger, and allspice.

Let's make a witbier! Look at that lovely citrus!

The third and final category that I am creating here today in this blog (you’re reading history here folks) is the one that lies in the middle – the category that encompasses all fruit beers where the brewer has chosen to celebrate a particular fruit and make it the star of the show. In fact, let’s call them “Fruit as the Star of the Show Brews” or FSSBs. These will be easy to spot, as they will probably include the name of the fruit being showcased in the title or style of the brew. This is the category where Belgian lambics live. This is also the category where most of your “they went too far” reactions are going to live, mainly because brewing with fruit is tricky.

Why is fruit brewing tricky you ask? It’s tricky because fruits react differently under boiling temperatures, time exposures and fermenting. Some fruit, like citrus, react favorably to the brewing process, maintaining their flavors and aromas, balancing well with bittering hops, and making the final product quite delightful. Then again, grapefruit is a citrus, and it probably wouldn't balance by itself, so there goes that theory. Contrarily, fruits like pumpkins lose the bulk of their flavor and aroma when brewing, which is why most pumpkin ales are heavily laced with pumpkin pie spices to ensure that the desired pumpkin flavor isn't lost.

Sam Calgione of Dogfish Head Craft Brewery prepping strawberries for his Tweason Ale.

Strawberries are another example of a fruit that loses most of its flavor and aroma while boiling. In fact, if you’re a chef or baker, you already know this as it applies to cooking as well as brewing. If you are setting out to make a strawberry beer, you’re already fighting an uphill battle. Many brewers do one of two things to ensure their strawberry beer tastes like strawberries. They either over strawberry it, particularly after the boil during fermentation, or they use strawberry extract which is mostly sugar either in place of the berries or to prop up the berries, again after the boil. The problem with extract is that it is very easy for the end result to taste like cough syrup.

This extract problem doesn't just apply to strawberries, but it seems that strawberries, due to their particular lack of cooperation when brewing, are the most glaring example of “when fruit beers go wrong.” Of course, the key to brewing is balance, so perhaps it’s not the extract that makes the beer unbearable, but rather that the extract is unbalanced. In standard brewing, you balance malt and hops – as in, if you’re setting out to make a hop bomb, you need to add more grain proportionate to how bitter your brew is getting. On the other hand, if you’re making a strong ale and are plussing up the malt to drive your ABV up, you need to add more hops in order to balance the sweetness of the grain.

Good advice right there.

The same type of principle applies to fruit brewing – which is why that last category (FSSBs) is so problematic. When your mission is to highlight a particular fruit, you’re already setting out to unbalance it because you want it to be the star of the show. The trick is to find a way to balance the flavor type without balancing the flavor itself. In other words, balance the sweetness of the cherries without overwhelming the cherry flavor. The pumpkin ale example is a good model of this, though as the pumpkin already has a subtle sweet flavor that is all but lost in the boil anyways, perhaps it is too easy. In this brewer’s opinion, it all comes back to hops. Just like overhopping to compensate for sweet malt, you overhop to compensate for sweet fruit. You could also go with spices to balance out the flavor, but that can be tricky too; if you use uncomplimentary spices, the whole thing could get weird quickly.

The best advice I can give for the drinker is to keep an open mind and try to appreciate and understand the beer you’re drinking for what it is. When you drink a fruit beer that is “not good,” try to dissect it and think about what went wrong. Perhaps now that you have a 101-level understanding of brewing with fruit, you can troubleshoot the brew and come up with ideas of how you would've done things differently. Then again, you could go to the other extreme and post a picture of yourself pouring it out on Untappd. Whatever you need to do.

Here’s to craft-brewed happiness… Cheers!